notmysecret:

carlinoworld:

Adbeardture time!

I am so in love

(Source: future-finn)

threadless:

Afternoon Delight" by Chris Bishop (GIF by Yunfan Tan)

Looking for something to do this afternoon? Check out this classic design and more old favorites on our bangin’ new tri-blend tees!


tango-mango:

Baking peanut butter cookies with Spinosaurus

The other day Spinosaurus dropped by for a visit. It was a great surprise to see him because he’s usually so busy, he doesn’t have time to hang out here the way he used to. I was just about to make some peanut butter cookies and he asked if he could help. As you can see, he was a great assistant! Hopefully he will come by more often and help with other projects in the kitchen and garden.

These peanut butter cookies are slightly chewy and coated in a thin layer of sugar, perfect for dunking in a glass of milk or your morning espresso. I’ve been baking them forever, but yesterday I realized it is more fun to make them with a friend. A recipe from Better Homes and Gardens.

Ingredients:

  • 1/2 cup peanut butter
  • 1/2 cup butter, softened
  • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
  • 1/2 cup packed brown sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
  • 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

Directions:

Beat peanut butter and butter with electric mixer on medium to high speed for 30 seconds. Add granulated sugar and brown sugar, baking soda, and salt. Beat until combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Beat in egg and vanilla until combined. Beat in as much of the flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in any remaining flour. Cover and refrigerate dough about 1 hour or until easy to handle.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Shape dough in 1-inch balls. Place balls 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet. Flatten the cookies by making crisscross marks with fork tines or dinosaur footprint, dipping utensil in sugar between flattening each cookie. Bake about 8 minutes or until edges are lightly browned. Transfer to wire racks. Cool. Makes about 3 dozen cookies.

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(Source: stephaniecoco)


fanboyin:

Stephen King being Stephen King

Ten Women I Have Been Warned Against Becoming:

1. The Girl Who Takes Up Too Much Space, always, her shoulders too wide in stairwells, her hips too big in doorways, her voice too loud in classes. This woman does not understand the art of crumbling, of curling herself tight like the spiral of a fern, soft, delicate, unwilling to reach out the ivy of her fingers to grasp onto what should rightfully be hers. This is a beast, an elephant, a moving mountain and she is capable of flattening you, she is capable of ruining you, she is capable of making you feel as small and insignificant in her life as she is supposed to be. You are this woman’s footnote to history, you are her side note in song lyrics, you are constantly interrupted by her with a witty joke you wish you thought of. I asked what the problem was with being a steamroller instead of a sunflower and I was laughed down.

2. The Beautiful One, the long hair or the slim waist or the pretty eyes or the lips like bowstrings. This woman looks good in everything because she’s confident in whatever you put her in. She’ll cut her hair short on you no matter how you like it, she’ll wear high heels and step on your opinions, she’ll look hot as hell no matter what size she is. See, the reason you can’t trust her is because women like this don’t need your permission, they’ll do as they please and get away with it. They’ll say no to you, over and over. Teach your daughters that beautiful means dangerous, teach them to distrust women who love themselves. Equate beautiful with vapid, equate pretty with stupid, take their power from them. Say they’re vain for their makeup, refuse to see them without it. These women are snakes, they are serpents. I said maybe the problem lies with you being unable to control yourself and was told to get off my pedestal.

3. A Bitch. Women are supposed to be ladies in the street but will tear skin under sheets. I’m told: Never raise your voice. Speak gently. Submit. Hold your opinion against your lips and when you admit to it, make sure it comes out as a butterfly wing suggestion. Don’t disagree. Don’t undermine someone else’s authority, regardless of whether or not they deserve your respect. Someone touches you, just move away from them. Don’t hit. Don’t talk back. Be like the ruins of Rome, only beautiful if you can’t hear your quiet death.

4. The Needy One. I have heard how others spit when they talk about how she gave you everything and you shoved it back down her throat until she choked on it, until she came back crawling and asked you what she did, until her palms and knees were scraped for want of just a little affection - never be this woman, I’m told, because she’s a joke and the joke is that she dared to have more emotion than you did. The truth is, I’m told, the one who cares less in a partnership is the one who wins. I didn’t know this was a competition.

5. The Cock Tease, certified stripper, how dare that girl look like that and not want me to sleep with her. Lust is always personified as a lady in red with a dress slit up her thigh. Lust is sinful because it’s power, it’s not asking for attention - it’s demanding it. I’m told she is the worst kind of woman, that looking good is supposed to be some kind of shame on her kin. I’m told not to leave the house in such a short skirt, not with a shirt so low, not with a lace back, not with high heels, not dressed like that. My lipstick can’t be too red, my hair can’t be too mussed, I can’t just “turn someone on like that and then leave them wanting.” I mentioned that instant gratification actually ruins our psyche and was told that being led on was “exhausting.” I said that there was a difference between purposefully tricking someone into liking you and just being attractive or friendly. I was told there’s also a difference between coffee and tea but both result in caffeine. I said, “I’ve been turned on in class by the girls I talk to but I didn’t expect anything from them,” and they said, “It’s different, you’re not a man,” but couldn’t explain where that difference was.

6. A Slut, obviously ruined by another person’s touch. It doesn’t matter how many people she’s actually been with, it’s all about the rumors she carries with her. Easy. Harlot. You’ll still try to get with her, you’ll still take her into your bed and kiss her and say things you don’t mean - but you’ll defame her name when you talk to your buddies. My father used to say “A slut is fine for the night, but the virgin is who you take home and marry.” Maybe he didn’t know he was teaching his daughter to hate her sexuality. Maybe he didn’t know that every time she’d be kissed, her whole system would shake until she felt ready to combust, shame and self-hatred shivering against her spine. Maybe he didn’t know she’d disconnect emotions and sex because he always told her, “Boys are different, they won’t care about you.” Nobody said to her that it was okay to experiment. See, the funny thing is, I’m a dancer so I know exactly where my center of gravity is. I know how hard I’ll fall in each direction. Yet out of fear of getting hurt, I won’t let a single person inside of my bed.

7. The Soulmate. Never love romance more than you love being cynical. Never show weakness, never like pink, never think maybe you might find someone nice and settle down with them. Someone will find you, I was told, And if you’re lucky, he’ll put up with you when you start getting old. Never be the woman who believes in happily ever after, never be dumb enough to think maybe someone could love you after all of your mistakes. It has nothing to do with whether or not a family is important to you and you’re in a good place where a relationship would make your life better - you’re not a princess. You don’t get married, you settle.

8. The Girl With Strength, who can outrun everyone and who is stronger than her boyfriend. “See the thing about boys,” says my daddy, “Is that you have to let them win.” I sat at home and read stories about Artemis and wanted to become the huntress, too. I wanted to howl at the moon, I wanted to slay the beasts that bested me, I wanted to rule my kingdom with bloody fists. But girls are never athletes, never supposed to be “built,” regardless of the fact civilizations were constructed on our spines and we made homes in war by the steel of our ribs. Never be strong. We are supposed to wilt.

9. The Lady CEO: because if you choose work over family, are you really a girl? How dare you fight your way to the top through every pair of eyes that bore through your blouse, through every meeting where you were hushed by the sound of someone else talking, through every time someone called you “sweetie,” how dare you yearn for something. Is your husband the stay-at-home one? I can’t imagine how that is going. He’s not a real man, after all. I don’t give it long before the divorce. How dare you decide you’re happy being single. Don’t you know you’re supposed to bear children. Where is your honor? Where is your wisdom? Who cares if you are the leader, the best suited for your position, the quickest-thinking, the one who makes the hardest clients come back again. Don’t you see? Across history, women have been terrible at success. They always lose their man in the end. (When I said, “I would rather be a famous author than a mediocre mother,” I was told, “No, don’t worry, you’ll be a fine mommy.”)

10. THE GIRL I AM: FIRECRACKER AND DON’T YOU FUCKING FORGET IT I’LL RIP YOU TO SHREDS AND I WON’T FUCKING REGRET IT I’M NOT YOUR PRETTY GIRL I’M NOT YOUR ANYTHING I’M PERFECT, MOTHERFUCKER, AND I’M NOT GOING TO GIVE UP WHAT I’M DOING. I DON’T WANT TO BE “LADYLIKE” THAT LITERALLY MEANS NOTHING I’M NOT GOING TO STOP STANDING UP AND DEMANDING WHAT’S COMING TO ME. I’M GONNA BE SOMEBODY. I’M GONNA MAKE THEM REMEMBER ME. I REFUSE TO BE OVERSHADOWED IN HISTORY. I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO CREATE BUT YOU MADE ME A DRAGON YOU PUT ME IN THE FIRE AND WHEN I STOPPED BURNING I LEARNED HOW TO GLOW DON’T THINK YOU CAN STOP ME YOU CAN’T TAME A TORNADO.


In respectful response to a poem tilted, “Ten men women have warned me against becoming." /// r.i.d (via inkskinned)

work

(via wintry-mix)


tsunflowers:

bye they’re so cute. this is so cute

Creative Writing, 101

totally420chronfused:

”Now lend me your ears. Here is Creative Writing 101:

  1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.
  2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.
  3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.

So I don’t forget

fistfulofweasley:

I think the thing people don’t realize with that bullshit “well not all guys are dangerous, you should give them a chance” or what the fuck ever is like 

if i had a plate of cookies and i was like yeah, a few of them have laxatives in them and one’s got cyanide in there, BUT THEY’RE NOT ALL LIKE THAT

you’re probably not gonna take a fucking cookie

(Source: acederek)


livelaughawesome:

youkoofthelovespot:

nanibgal:

howardhill101:

amymexy:

mr-egbutt:

ascenti:

totallyfubar:

paragonpostcards:

helioscentrifuge:

Sorry not sorry.

The men of tumblr unite. Because this is more than fighting the patriarchy, this is fighting for the voice of the people.

image

*Phone rings*

image

THE FUCK DID YOU SAY THE PATRIARCHY WAS UP TO?

image

I’M ON MY WAY.

*Banana Rings*

Who is this how did you get this numb—THE PATRIARCHY IS DOING WHTA

SAVE SOME PATRIARCH BLOOD FOR US

3:01PM SYDNEY TIME

Hello?

Patriarchy WHAT?!

AW HELL NO

I’M COMIN YOU MOTHERFUCKERS I DON’T EVEN CARE IF THEY DON’T LET ME ON A PLANE

Fucking bro strider come out!! Omg HAHAHAAH I love theses guys

Meanwhile In England……


"Jolly great bit of Tea"

-Phone Rings- 

"THE PATRIARCHY DOING WHAT!?!!?!?!"

"Those Bloody Wankers!!!!!!"

"It Looks Like Tea Time Is Going To Have To Wait"

"It’s A Jolly Good Thing I kept My Old Equipment…."

"All Right Old Chaps, Im On My Way!!!"

"TALLY-HO!!!!!"

I just reblogged this, but IT GOT BETTER.

TALLY HO *dies laughing*

THIS IS CUTE!

#fuzzlife #whitebitch #fetch #betch

a few free writes

Theres somthing about dreaming that’s safe

don’t you think?

its a world, all you’re own where the worst that can happen

is you wake up being the same person you were before you got to be invincible

i’m not sure if i can, or how to, approach my waking life with the same cozy abandon, but i’m trying

there’s a strength in being vulnerable, in living like you can’t wake up and start again

in loving and giving with the same abandon most people dream

being strong isn’t always safe

but it’s usually pretty wise to cultivate a source of strength beyond yourself

self love, for me, falls short much of the time because

well i’m not entirely sure of the reasons, but i know in my moments of weakness and self loathing

it’s the hope for little things (the new mocha place I haven’t tried, or new album i need to hear, or a birthday gift i’m excited to give) that fodders my flame when it fades

well actually

i’ve often thought i’m a big picture person made up of little things

it’s no wonder really that that’s what inspires hope in me when i have none

maybe thats where my nearly ever present awkwardness comes from

as a tall gangly bright person i never feel like i physically fit the little (lovely) thing i perceive myself to be inwardly

 

I’ve been having a hard time doing the whole connection thing lately

I dont want to feel i’m not worth the time of these people, or that i’m unworthy just because it’s not a right fit for which ever folks i’m focused on. I’m committed to dating inspiration now and i hope it turns out for the best

i’ve stopped paying rent and started strengthening my relationship with my husband via myself

I’m launching podcasts and myself at the world

I hope something sticks and that I don’t end up stuck in a rut of any unsortable sort

so far my openness has lead me to have a lot of amazing experiences but also a lot of self doubt and I already have enough of that to rival all the attendees of any middle school across our (mostly) great nation.

I’m hung up on my own hang ups, on my not good enoughness

the weirdness I spent so much time cultivating and used to pride myself on has become not just a crutch but a buffer zone

where I feel like I’m awkwardly shuffling

i need to focus on making myself happy

im not sure how or what will really make that happen

but i feel like if i throw myself into creating that i’ll feel a little bit less like somethings missing

and a lot less jealous of the ease at which my friends adventure through life.

summer is so close

i feel like that or art must be where all these butterflies are coming from

Check out this mix on @8tracks: Aural Pleasure #5 (Surreally High) by Julie_barrera.

Check out this mix on @8tracks: Aural Pleasure #9 (smokey sundays) by Julie_barrera.